Tuesday, February 01, 2005
THE RACE BETWEEN MINDFULNESS AND MADNESS
An interesting concept I've experienced many times but which I'd never put into words ended up as a kind of eureka as we played last night: emotional expression/madness versus keeping it all together.
Basically it got down to this - as I personally became more excited playing last night and by that, I mean infused with emotion, it became evident that I was treading the line between connectedness and madness. I've always believed what turns people on musically is when an artist has the ability to set loose the free-est aspects of his/her soul and to have that freedom felt/experienced vicariously by the listener. In other words, if a musician is simply reading notes off sheet music, it translates as that - flat (I always loved music because if someone is a poser, when they play, they're visible as that - a poser, and there's no disguising it. Conversely, if you're real, you're real)Now if the same musician is infusing sheet music with excitement and emotion, then the resultant piece can be FELT.
The development which took shape last night was this: I was playing and as I became more and more warmed up thru the nevening, I began to dig deeper and deeper into the "well" to summon the emotions neccessary to build the excitement level. That generally comes about after you get past the point of your initial charge from the newness of a situation etc. As you go deeper and deeper you tend to stray farther and farther from a rational, left brained reality. This is a VERY visceral experience and very pleasurable (splanchnic, to say the least!) but at the same time VERY dangerous beacause you are literally flirting with a form of anarchy which, when you are in a "team" situation, can very easily upset the balance. So the dance becomes balancing the sensual lure of madness and mayhem with the responsibility of maintaining the structure for which you've rehearsed so hard. And I believe that knowing your material inside and out really does allow the prospect of freedom a greater possibility of occuring than not being fully practiced. The chance of having to revert back to rational thinking while in the process of total expression can seriously inhibit the right brain experience. What a screeching halt your freed emotions have to endure if you all of a sudden they have no idea where they are!
It seems to be a type of horserace in which the emotional and rational parts of your playing brain compete - the emotions charging wrecklessly and with no regard to conventionality while at the same time the rational components are conscientiously attempting to endure a shaky grip on the wildly bounding, bucking rodeo show that playing live music is.
Basically it got down to this - as I personally became more excited playing last night and by that, I mean infused with emotion, it became evident that I was treading the line between connectedness and madness. I've always believed what turns people on musically is when an artist has the ability to set loose the free-est aspects of his/her soul and to have that freedom felt/experienced vicariously by the listener. In other words, if a musician is simply reading notes off sheet music, it translates as that - flat (I always loved music because if someone is a poser, when they play, they're visible as that - a poser, and there's no disguising it. Conversely, if you're real, you're real)Now if the same musician is infusing sheet music with excitement and emotion, then the resultant piece can be FELT.
The development which took shape last night was this: I was playing and as I became more and more warmed up thru the nevening, I began to dig deeper and deeper into the "well" to summon the emotions neccessary to build the excitement level. That generally comes about after you get past the point of your initial charge from the newness of a situation etc. As you go deeper and deeper you tend to stray farther and farther from a rational, left brained reality. This is a VERY visceral experience and very pleasurable (splanchnic, to say the least!) but at the same time VERY dangerous beacause you are literally flirting with a form of anarchy which, when you are in a "team" situation, can very easily upset the balance. So the dance becomes balancing the sensual lure of madness and mayhem with the responsibility of maintaining the structure for which you've rehearsed so hard. And I believe that knowing your material inside and out really does allow the prospect of freedom a greater possibility of occuring than not being fully practiced. The chance of having to revert back to rational thinking while in the process of total expression can seriously inhibit the right brain experience. What a screeching halt your freed emotions have to endure if you all of a sudden they have no idea where they are!
It seems to be a type of horserace in which the emotional and rational parts of your playing brain compete - the emotions charging wrecklessly and with no regard to conventionality while at the same time the rational components are conscientiously attempting to endure a shaky grip on the wildly bounding, bucking rodeo show that playing live music is.
